- Try to make arrangements for Christmas as far in advance as possible. Negotiate a time on Christmas day when you can see your children, or compromise and see them on Boxing Day for your own special Christmas.
- You could also agree to alternate years, so that you each get to spend Christmas Day with your children every other year.
- Don’t try to compete with your children’s other parent. Over-spending or trying to outdo one another will lead to disappointment and heartache.
- You could even come up with a budget for you both to spend on the children, and discuss what you plan to get them. This way, you will avoid competition and the children will not end up with identical gifts.
- If you face spending Christmas Day alone, see if any friends are in the same situation and make plans with them. You could invite them round for Christmas lunch or go out and volunteer together.
- Put your children’s needs before your own. It’s not fair to ruin your children’s special day by putting them in unfair situations, such as having to choose between you and their other parent.
- Keep in touch with the resident parent to find out whether your child has any nativity plays or special events that you could attend.
- Your children will feel happier if you keep them involved with plans and arrangements. Good communication between you, your children and their other parent will be beneficial for everyone.
- As your children get older, they may want to have their own say in what they do for Christmas, and might want to do their own thing as well.
- If you are used to your children’s other parent doing the shopping and feel overwhelmed; talk to him or her and ask for ideas.
Top ten tips for separated parents at Christmas
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