How to cope with moving house

5min read

Managing the change

Change is to be expected. You can’t avoid it, but you can help them to cope with it. Understanding the impact this may be having on your child. Remember that whilst you might be excited about the move they might not be. Try not to feel too annoyed if they don’t share your enthusiasm but try and work out why they feel sad about leaving their old life behind.

Supporting your child

It is important to offer lots of reassurance and take time to talk. If they open up about how they feel don’t put down what they say even if you do think it is petty. Their life experience will be limited compared to yours and this could feel overwhelming for them. Knowing that you will listen to them and be there for them is important for now and the future.

They may be worried about starting a new school. Be aware of this as the countdown to the new term begins. Children often act out their feelings showing signs of stress or frustration.

If you have teenagers, be patient with them as they come to terms with the changes. They may want to spend lots of time on socials talking to their friends. This is ok as this may be how they adjust to the new move.

Getting them involved

Get the children involved in the new house so they can start to feel like it is their home. Painting their bedroom or giving their furniture a makeover can be done without spending lots of money.

Settling in your new home

Introducing yourself to your neighbours can give you an idea of what other children live locally, what school they go to and their ages. If your child is shy, you might want to invite a family over for a BBQ rather than try and force friendships for your children. In a relaxed environment children are likely to mix by themselves.

If children come to play for the first time plan something fun for them so that everyone has a good experience. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself though and remember to keep it simple - a game of football or painting. Activities will help with any shyness or awkwardness at the beginning.

Look at ways you can get to know people in your new community too. This will help your child see that you also have to make new friends. This will take some of the pressure off them as they’ll see that they’re not the only ones who have to get used to the changes.

New schools and afterschool clubs

Schools usually allow new pupils to look round and spend time before the move. If you haven’t been able to do this, it may be worth doing a couple of trial runs to school in the holidays, so they are more familiar with the journey and the school. Most areas have play schemes and clubs in the holidays such as football and drama clubs. Look at different options for the school holidays as your child will be able to meet children and make friends before they start school. Once they build friendships take a step back and give them some space to navigate this.

When your child starts the new term stay in touch with the school so you can get a feel for how well they are settling in.

Further resources

If you would like further support and advice, call our helpline on 0808 800 2222 or email us at askus@familylives.org.uk. You can talk to us online via our live chat service or message us via WhatsApp on 07441 444125 to connect with experienced professional family support workers and highly-trained volunteers. You may find it helps to find out how other parents and carers have coped with this on our online forums. We also have a range of free self-guided online parenting courses that can help through the ages and stages of parenting.

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